Could Not Leave It Buzzing By The Bed

Could this be him (Photo by www.mendiphillsaonb.org.uk

Can you spot the car? (Photo by http://www.mendiphillsaonb.org.uk)

2 July 2014

C – I forgot to say, blog fans are asking about Mr S – they are missing updates.

S – yes, he was one of our best characters. Bloody nuisance but very close to home, so worried about being found out. When blog goes viral and we have more money than we know what to do with he will be right back in there. In fact, he will be begging for a slot in the Book/Film/Play. No sign of him today as usual. Probably tucked away in some shady lay-by having a snooze!

C – yes, probably is. At second clean and I am dripping with sweat. I was expecting great things form you now that you have that sprancy new up-to-date mobile but I am only getting the same old stuff. Why are you not snapchatting and instagramming along with sending me photos – come on old girl!!

S – I may have up-to-date mobile but I do not have the contract to go with it. I have the same old SIM and the same £8 per month contract, so no snapchatting or instagramming for me – I do not have any free internet connection time and would not know what to do with it if I did.

C – oh, what a cheap skate you are. I had a text from George at 3.00am this morning – I could not leave it buzzing by the bed – had to look. His bank account was overdrawn and he did not know why. I have not heard a peep from him for three weeks and he only texted when he needed money. Went to the bank this morning but he had not signed to say I could talk about his account with the bank staff (as I had requested before he left). He thought there would be no need for me to get involved with his finances – how wrong could he be. One of the ladies behind the desk, who knows me, did take pity on me and gave a general indication of how much money I needed to put into the account to take it out of the red – thank God for someone with some common sense.

S – oh dear, more dramas from the Antipodes – I have all this to look forward to when mine are over there – or on a road trip in the USA, which seems to be what Sophie is planning for her gap year!

To Drink Or Not To Drink, That Is The Question?

I love a drop of the fizz!

I love a drop of the fizz! (Photo from The Guardian)

26 June 2014

C – just paid the bloody fine that George acquired in New Zealand. I had put it on the back burner in the hope that it would go away but another letter fluttered onto my doormat and the fine has now increased, due to the addition of court costs. I should have paid it immediately – it is now $180 – hells’ teeth. Can that boy never keep out of trouble – he is costing me money and he is on the other side of the world. Have had to add it to my credit card which is already pretty much up to its limit. I need some more cleaning jobs – I will have to advertise my services.

S – oh damn, I thought you had paid that. It was never going to go away and you do not want George to be unable to return to New Zealand because of a criminal record, due to an unpaid fine.

27 June 2014

C – how are you this fine sunny morning after your non-drinking night out (NOT) – that was never going to happen once that glass of Prosecco was pressed into your hand? You did not put up much of a fight when seconds arrived either.

S – as I said the other day I have no will power. I think we escaped in the nick of time – one more glass could have sent me reeling over the edge resulting in appalling hangover and duvet day.

C – yes, I agree it could have turned into an unpleasant “morning after the night before”. Michael was our knight without the shining armour providing a taxi service.

28 June 2014

C – apparently, I am cross all the time according to my husband, I wonder why? Is it because he behaves like a teenager?

S – well, my day deteriorated very early with the arrival of a £550 bill from the Taxman. It has to be paid by the end of July or interest will be charged. What a lovely start to the day.

C – why do they always send these letters out to arrive on Saturday (they do that with the dreaded school reports) and spoil ones weekend. It only drives one to drink in the evening – I suppose it makes a change that it is the Taxman’s fault!