Predictive Text Causing Problems



9 July 2014

C – I’m so hot – is it just me?

S – no, it is boiling in this office but luckily I have may fan the size of a small tyre. I am “hot flushing” like mad – do not know what I would do without it.

C – thank God no menopause for me yet! I am at my usual clean for today. All is quiet re the pending holiday to France, thank goodness. I am fitting in extra cleans today because of going to Hartpury on Thursday, when the school is closed due to the strike. It will be nose to the grindstone until about three and I feel exhausted already. Thank goodness I have my trusty digital radio – it is Woman’s Hour at the moment and they are discussing the benefits of competing in a Triathlon – are there any, I ask?

C – well, there are the fitness and weight loss benefits Camilla!

S – I suppose there are those to consider but I do not think it is for me. By the way, Harry Potter is going grey and has a drink problem – hooray!!

S – is this in real life or in some book I have not heard of?

C – in the new book – it was being discussed on the news this morning. Does that J K Rowling not have enough money – why does she not just take it easy, have a good time or buy a Caribbean island with all that dosh? I am at the usual clean and the lady of the house seems to have given up writing notes for me. However, there is a huge pile of ironing – what is she spending that extra day off work each week she now has doing, I wonder. How are things in your neck of the woods and how is our friend Mr S?

S – no sign of Mr S and office fairly quiet.

C – just arrived at third clean and no sign of the people. They must have forgotten I was cleaning today instead of Thursday and shoved off out for the day – bugger.

S – do you not have a key to the house?

C – they don’t like to give me one – silly old farts.

S – oh bigger!

C – I see you are having “predictive text” problems like me. The other day I texted Crystal and instead of writing “full up” it did “fuck off” – very embarrassing don’t you think?

10 July 2014

S – I am now officially a scab as I have crossed the picket line. Michael used to be a member of the Transport and General Workers Union, when he was lorry driving, and he was not amused that I am working today. My sister’s day centre is open today – no one is stirking there – how could I take a day off when they are all working hard? Have you arrived at Hartpury yet? Hope you have a good time and a small rest from the daily grind.

C – oh dear, crossing a picket line – not good. Have not arrived yet; just at services. I have eaten a Full English Breakfast and now feel a bit sick.


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