Never Work With Children Or Animals

How am I going to exit these bucket seats in style?

How am I going to exit these bucket seats in style?

C – I was recently appointed as a part time sales negotiator with a local branch of Estate Agents. I have spent some hours today in “training” for my new role, lots to learn, computer system, jargon, telephone system, middle aged brain is now seriously overloaded.

I am feeling very matriarchal as the average age in the office is about 16 and I feel like the old battleaxe. Must make a mental note to read more of the blog entitled How Not To Act Old by Pamela Redmond Satran for some tips, as I will be spending most of Saturday accompanying a very young man to a number of viewings. I noticed to my horror, as I was departing the office, that he has a very small flashy sports car with those bucket seats that I will have to shoehorn myself in and out of several times during the day. I so do not want to make a fool of myself needing to be prized from the bucket seat, unable to get enough purchase with my middle aged limbs to make an impressive exit from the aforesaid flashy sports car. Must not wear a skirt or high heels.

IT Guru, Rich Baby, came over this evening to give Sheshe and myself a master class in getting Google to find our blog easily and blogging in general. Two hours of intensive computer info, my brain has now expired so am using wine to regenerate the few remaining cells. Seriously, am now not sure if we have got a handle on the whole blogging thing, the final straw that broke the camel’s back was when we realised the “Instagram Widget” (which we need to help us spread our blog to the world) can only be accessed via a smart phone app or Apple device. Neither of us have such expensive, sort after phones, unlike our kids who have them firmly pressed into their hot little hands and are constantly tapping away at them like birds, Instagraming and Snapchatting to their hearts content. Therefore, we cannot access this widget until we can upgrade our old “brick like” phone technology. The sad truth is that, even if would could afford to upgrade, it would take us a month of Sundays to get to grips with how to use them. This is, of course, the reason we stick with our old phones; hanging on to the past for dear life instead of being the cool mums our kids constantly remind us their friends have. We have failed yet again.

And finally, my daughter announced to IT Guru, Rich Baby, much to my embarrassment, that she overheard Sheshe and myself discussing foreplay. “How disgusting is that!!!” she cried. I pointed out to Rich Baby, with a very red face, that we were talking hypothetically and using the phrase as a technical blogging term. Not sure it washed but he was polite enough not to discuss the matter any further. Phew, think I may have got away with that one!!!! The advice is never work with children or animals as they always let you down in company,

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