Here we are finally posting some text messages – we are truly on the edge now! It has taken us two days, two sleepless nights and two bowls of homemade watercress soup to share our blog with the outside world, whoever they may be. We will try to keep you in the loop with who is who as we progress. More wine may be needed. We hope you will bear with us as we are getting started grappling with technology and, by the way, still no pastel pictures – watch this space. As you can see, texts are a bit backdated – has taken some time and immeasurable endeavour to arrive at this point.
17 February 2013
C – At last some good news to share – George has been invited for an interview at Manchester – hooray!
S – Have you finished cleaning?
C – Nearly, then need to go to town do you want to meet me for a cuppa.
S – Ok. Call when you are on your way to town.
C – Will be there by three – meet me in The Pony with the Pink Parasol, they do a good cuppa and it does not cost the earth.
C – It sure isn’t my lucky day, At enormous town house today, place like a tip, the conservatory is like a ploughed field due to dogs and then she asks me can I do extra day per week – OMG. Would rather boil my head in hot fat.
S – Say she needs to up the wages.
C – Yes, I should do. It is soul-destroying cleaning this house – what does she do all day? She is so thin like a skinny whippet.
S – Must be booze, drugs, fags and definitely no food – think it is only way to do it.
Mass hysteria has erupted in the production of today’s update as Sheshe and Camilla have just discovered how to get a smiley face. Only wish we could find a key as useful in the kitchen. 🙂
18 February 2013
S – Well bugger all to do here. Will have my smoked salmon sandwich and cuppa soup – not sure how to fill next 5 hours as nearly out of internet quota time.
C – You will have to take a book in with you or you could start to write one yourself god knows we have some tales to tell. Heard this really good joke today. You know they dug up the bones of Richard III under some car park. Now they are digging up Tesco car parks because they are looking for his horse, ha ha.
S – Very good – what do people think they are eating when they buy our leading supermarket’s value lasagna? Spoke too soon work rushing in now – have to put book on hold.
C – Think I fancy a cuppa soup; sadly no smoked salmon in my fridge just ropy old processed ham which could be zebra I suppose. Hey ho.
C – Mmmm there are few pleasures in life quite as satisfying as a cuppa soup.
19 February 2013
S – How did interview go?
C – Nerve wracking only two of us interviewed. Same woman interviewed me as last time when I did not get the job, so not a cat in hell’s chance. Actually, is pretty crap job; front line taking all the grief. Off to funeral now.
21 February 2013
C – Oh no just looked at watch and only 5.30 pm – need wine!
S – Already started with a beer. Feel less guilty drinking beer at 5.30pm than drinking wine.
C – Have you given it up for Lent – wine that is?
S – Thought about it but not sure I could stick to it.
C – Must give it a try; am bored, cooking Sunday roast that no one will want – takes all evening to wash up then bed, living the high life.
S – Same here. If I win the lottery will eat out or get take away for a year.
C – Brilliant idea – a different restaurant every night.
S – Absolutely.
C – Want to share with you. George returned home after some 24 hours with no contact. Announced he was going to his room to do some research for his college work. Oh how my heart lifted, he has grown up at last, become a responsible adult. Who am I kidding he was sleeping like a baby when I looked in – research my arse!
S – Oh well, at least you are all healthy, as Toby says. Am definitely keeping texts and writing that book – title “Text Messages From The Edge”.
C – Love that title, would be better than Bridget Jones Diary can just see the book, film, play we will be eating out every night with bells on, as Ozzie Patrick would say. He will have to come to the opening night, red carpet and all. Wow.
S – Will start typing when quiet at work.
C – George must be in a very deep sleep as he did not come out when I was rowing with Toby about the bloody sheep that are dying like flies and what a waste of time and money. Lots of swearing!
S – Why are they dying?
C – Because they can!!!! Still all is not lost; The Archers are on at 7.00 pm so at least I have that to look forward to. Oh and Pick of The Week before that – more wine needed.
S – I thought you had given up.
C – No bloody way.